Makin' Love and Doin' It Stories
East Bay Lesbian History Project


Name Optional:                   Ruth

Date:                                      April, 1971

Your Age:                              27

Her Age:                                29

Your Sexual Identity:           Hoping (virgin dyke)

Her Sexual Identity              Ditto


My First:

Cathy said I could crash at her house during the anti- war (Vietnam) march in April, 1971. We marched with the Gay contingent, went to a Lesbian picnic afterwards. I assumed she was an experienced Lesbian. We went to her house and discovered that the house cat had peed on the sleeping bag I had planned to borrow. So sharing a bed was the only option. But I remember that I kissed her first. The next morning, I asked if she had done that a lot before. She said, no, itÕs my first time. What about you? We both thought the other one knew what she was doing!! And neither of us did- but we acted like pros. And figured it all out quite well - I think.



Name Optional:                   Cathy Cade  

Date:                                      1971

Your Age:                              29

Her Age:                                27

Your Sexual Identity:           Feminist wanting to come out

Her Sexual Identity:             Feminist wanting to come out


My First:

The first time I made love to a woman was in San Francisco. Ruth was a campus traveler for a New Left organization of academics, New University Conference (NVC). She was passing thru town, scheduled to stay over night with me. We spent April 17. 1971 the last big Anti-Vietnam War march at Golden Gate Park where we just happened to march with the lesbian and gay contingent. Active in the WomenÕs Liberation Movement for 3 years, IÕd been trying to come out for 9 months. Ruth and I spent the late afternoon still walking around town Š talking and talking. Finally, we arrived back in my room in a womenÕs collective apartment. Soon we were lying together on my bed, still talking & talking Š while I furiously combed my mind for how to move things forward. Eventually, I turned my head and kissed her on the lips. We didnÕt know what to do Š but it was enough. The next day I declared myself a Lesbian.



Name Optional:                   Not Given     

Date:                                      2006  

Your Age:                              64      

Her Age:                                64

Your Sexual Identity:           Lesbian / Lesbian Feminist         

Her Sexual Identity:             Lesbian / Lesbian Feminist


My favorite:

Waking early on a Sunday morning

In her bed

My arms full of her

Full of this smooth, soft woman.

I stroke her stomach.

She murmurs.

I wait, then stroke her back.

Hums from her.

My hand moves lower.

I wait for her reply,

Lightly, checking for her assent,

I open her.

And open to my creativity.

A delicate, beauty-filled dance.

It is the first time I have made love to a woman in seven years.



Name Optional:                   Rachel                      

Date:                                      Summer of Ō84

Your Age:                             17

Her Age:                               18

Your Sexual Identity:          Lesbian

Her Sexual Identity:            Lesbian


My first:

I met my 1st lover at a group for dykes under 21. We both lived with our parents. She was out (I wasnÕt) and her mom was very supportive. The first time was in her bed at her house, her mom down the hall. I loved making out but was terrified of cunt. I was overwhelmed and didnÕt know what to do- IÕd never had and orgasm before and didnÕt that night. We muddled through. Kissing was always the best part. With my next girlfriend, I finally found my groove.



Name Optional:                   Not Given

Date:                                      Not Given

Your Age:                              23

Her Age:                                25

Your Sexual Identity:          Queer

Her Sexual Identity:            Lesbian


My first:

Her house, next morning, her lover dropped by, left, then I left. I was so happry to finally do it with a woman! I didnÕt care.  I met her at Ann KongÕs Bleach Bottle Pig Farm Cafˇ, formerly the Tea Spot on San Pablo. I ran into her later at the Berkeley Bowl and confessed to her that sheÕd been my first. She exclaimed that this kept happening to her Š Bringing girls out.



Name Optional:                   Not Given

Date:                                      August, 2003

Your Age:                              43

Her Age:                                Unknown

Your Sexual Identity:           Dyke

Her Sexual Identity:            1 Femme, 2 Dyke BOI, 2 other Femme tops


A favorite:

The time I did a 5 way at Michigan WomenÕs Music FestivalÉ It was my introduction to the Twilight Zone. One sexy femme flirted with me and I fisted her while 2 others watched. Then, they joined in and fisted a dyke boi, but she couldnÕt come cuz she needed a Butch type to take her, so I did, and the other two too the femme. It was so hot as I channeled every  (canÕt read) the Mother Earth and Sky right down to her cunt, and she howled with joy!



Name Optional:                   Hanna & Maureen

Date:                                      Fall, 2002     

Your Age:                              21

Her Age:                                21

Your Sexual Identity:           Really Gay

Her Sexual Identity:            Gay, Gay, Gay


Our First:

Hannah - After late-night gay chalking on campus, Maureen came up to my place to talk.  We watched a movie and pretended tojust hang out. Then we made out and fell asleep holding hands.


Maureen - Hanna was a slow mover- I was like move in. But no kissing. I think I took  matters into my own hands at like 2 am. It was the best kiss ever. I think my favorite anecdote was a year before we got together, where I told my then-boyfriend, we can stay together, but in a year this girl Hannah is coming back from abroad and I think weÕre gonna date. 4 years next month.



Name Optional:                   Orianna        

Date:                                      August, 1996

Your Age:                              30

Her Age:                                26

Your Sexual Identity:           "Open"

Her Sexual Identity:             Dyke


My First:

And the Toaster Oven Goes ToÉ

I asked her, May I?  Just May I have a little window of time and place with you? I just need to knowÉAm I?  Am I É?


She smiled, cut me those gray eyes, and drawled, SureÉ


Under the pines I began the kissing of her skin, the soft exploration of her cheeks, her lips, her eyelashes, her neck.  I kissed this long lovely woman, from her head to her toes, from her nipples to her clit. The Lover rose inside me, moved in confidence, passion generously offered, love gracefully bestowed.


I came again to her warm moist cleft, and paused.


May I? I asked.


Again, the smile. Eyes closed, she simply said, Do whatever you like.


My Lover Self moved through my lips right on into her, gently pressing heart and soul into fold and passage, drinking and kissing her, watching her move and rise and roll, hearing her softly moan and sigh, and then the beautiful shudders of her pleasure.


My body felt fully alive, content, ecstatic. I gazed up at the wonder of her openness and the naturalness of making love to another woman.


In time, she pulled me up to her side. Her eyes lit and happy, she looked curiously into mine and said, Are you sure that was your first time?



Name Optional:                   Orianna

Date:                                      June, 1997

Your Age:                              31

Her Age:                                30

Your Sexual Identity:           Dyke

Her Sexual Identity:             Dyke


A Favorite:

The Garnet Red Dress and the Dark Chocolate Cake


I donÕt remember all the details, but I do remember these:


For the first time in my life, I wore a gown that I looked so sexual in, I frightened my mother.

I remember I was so excited about this woman coming over I felt like an electric wire.


I can still see her on my doorstep, dressed all in black.  Big and butch.


I remember her eyes were full of fire.


I donÕt think we had the dinner IÕd prepared. Just went right on to dessertÉ


Me, on my back on the floor, with the first piece of that cake right in the hollow of my throat.


Her, coming to me at a pace that was both powerful and slow. Her teeth. Her tongue. Her mouth.


I remember the eating of that cake.  The sharing of more cake. The forgetting of the cake.


I remember really wanting to be gorgeously fucked, but still being too shy to say so.


I remember her fucking me gorgeously anyway, with her eyes, her mouth, her thigh, her thumb and fingers.


I remember a marvelous scent I had never smelled before that came from deep inside me.


I was so full of her I cried.



Name Optional:                   Not Given     

Date:                                      1969

Your Age:                              27

Her Age:                                25 +/-

Your Sexual Identity            Straight - married

Her Sexual Identity              Straight - married


My First:

The bed between us could have been a state. I lay, never more awake in my life, one yearning, pulsating urge to touch her. Six years of waiting, the long bus ride to Atlanta, the interminable visit with her ex-husband, finally over.  Now, alone, and in the same bed, instead of leaving me tired, I am drained of all reserve, all restraint, pumped with energy. I reached out to her, or maybe, she to me. But we came together. All that came before was over. My life began. She taught me to swim in the ocean, to lie on the sand uncovered, to love.



Name Optional:                   Not Given

Date:                                      1978

Your Age:                              36

Her Age:                                36

Your Sexual Identity            Lesbian Feminist

Her Sexual Identity              Lesbian Feminist


A favorite:

I was out one morning early for some reason and decided to go see Sue. She lived in a machine shop behind the house she owned. I sneaked down the drive way, as quiet as I could be, so not to wake her tenants. I whispered at her door, edged it open with my foot and stroked Po to keep him from barking. Sue appeared from within the dark room, frowning, sleepy. I kissed her and ran my hands down her back, first pulling her to me, then pushing her against the door frame. She pulled me inside, both of us rolling against the cool wall till we felt a table that we wrapped ourselves onto, still kissing, still holding, still exploring, her warm skin against my morning cold. She suddenly tensed and took my face in her arms, making me catch her gaze. She gestured to the lump in her bed and in the silence, I heard for the first time, the in and out sounds of a sleeping woman 20 feet away. I rested my forehead on Sue=s chest right below her chin and waited for her lead. We made love, slowly, silently. I was just as quiet going as I had been coming.



 Yours? And yours? And hers?